Controlling 4 speed hood motor

I have a motor controlled in 4 different speeds with 4 separate relays, the original system are controlling the relays in a way so only one of then are active.
Like when running speed 2 the second relay are on and if speed 3 are selected second relay goes off and third goes on.
Also the light must be controlled with the same remote.
Can this behavior be programmed with relay output and remote control ?
Any suggestions to witch part to use would be nice.
Thanks in advance